“As I continued to surrender to Her healing body, I began to realize that, despite what whitemalegod had taught me, my body was not an enemy to be subdued and colonized. I began to let go of an ideal body size and instead slowly built peace with my body. I began each day by getting out of the shower, compassionately examining my naked body in the full-length mirror, and reminding myself that my body was my best friend. Unlike whitemalegod, my body had never rejected me, given up on me, starved me, broken up with me, or threatened me. Despite all that whitemalegod had done to it, my body was still doing its absolute best to keep me alive. I cultivated compassion for my body by each day focusing on one part of my body and verbally thanking it for being on my side and working to keep me alive, despite it all.
“After months of practicing daily body gratitude, I experienced a magical shift. One day, I looked in the mirror and realized that my body was the physical representation of the Sacred Black Feminine. Through all my issues with bingeing, restricting, and over-exercising, She had been with me all along — affirming, sustaining, and supporting me — in the form of my body. Through all of my failed attempts to win validation from whitemalegod and his minions, She had been there all along, keeping me alive and sticking by my side. Shocked and still naked, I dropped to the hardwood floor and instinctively stretched my arm toward my reflection in the mirror. I wanted to touch Her holy and beautiful body. I wanted to touch my holy and beautiful body.”
