The Danes have been voted the happiest people in the world for every year since 1973. Jessica Joelle Alexander, an American columnist and mom living in Europe, and Iben Dissing Sandahl, a licensed psychotherapist and family counselor, do a cross-cultural examination of the differences between American and Danish parenting styles. In the U.S. kids are raised on the value of competition and individualism. In Denmark, there is little pressure to succeed and the emphasis is more on empathy and teamwork.
Alexander and Sandahl present six tips from Danish parents in the
Acronym PARENT: Play, Authenticity, Reframing, Empathy, No Ultimatums, and Togetherness. These character qualities both inspire and give hope for parents as they try to stay connected with children who are increasingly enslaved to their technological devices.
One of the most fascinating chapters is on hygge, which means to relax and "to cozy around together." Family life is enhanced by playing games, eating nice meals, and just hanging out together. Hygge is "a virtue, a point of pride, and a mood or state of mind." It is something Danes identify with "both in action and in being." Children grow up feeling connected to others.
The authors suggest 18 more tips for parents who think highly of looking on the bright side of things and taking quality time to foster closer family bonds. They describe Danes as "realistic optimists" who don't ignore negative input but simply choose to "focus on the other information at hand to write a richer, more loving story about themselves, their children, and life in general."
This is a snappy, sane, and salutary book on parenting with style, vigor, and positivity.
