”Shame is a vague, undefined heaviness that presses on our spirit, dampens our gratitude for the goodness of life, and slackens the free flow of joy,” writes Lewis B. Smedes, professor in integrative studies in the Graduate School of Psychology at Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena, California. He has a knack for shaking out the meaning in knotty religious subjects such as forgiveness, commitment, and personal ethics. Although quite a number of books about shame are available, Smedes’ commentary cuts through the abstractions and brings home some startling truths about this primal feeling.

After pointing out the difference between shame and guilt, the author examines the kinds of people who are prime candidates for this “feeling of unworthy.” They include obsessive moralizers, compulsive comparers, approval addicts, and those who feel condemned by their own dreams.

At one time or another, we are all oppressed by the heaviness of feeling inadequate, unacceptable, and worthless. “Shame burdened people,” Smedes observes, “are the sort whom Jesus had in mind when he invited the ‘weary and heavy laden’ to trade their heaviness for his lightness.” One of the major challenges of the spiritual path is to set aside what he calls “the false feeling inflicted by the false ideals implanted in us by secular culture, graceless religion, and unaccepting parents.” God calls us to be all we are meant to be, and that has very little to do with measuring up to the standards set by others.

Smedes share some very personal moments from his life when shame was overcome by grace. He points to the parable of the Prodigal Son and Isak Dineson’s “Babette’s Feast” as two wondrous stories about “the traces of grace” which can help us appreciate the firepower of joy. Best of all, he makes clear that God’s acceptance helps us to “live lightly” with our unhealthy shame, our imperfections, and our critics.