Good manners consist of far more than saying "please" when asking for a favor, and "thank you" to those who have helped us. It is rooted in a willingness to make sacrifices so that we can live together with others without unnecessary conflict. Good manners means
• not cutting in line even when we are impatient, and might well think that our time is more important than other people's
• offering our seat on the bus or train to one who is older or weaker, even though it is definitely pleasanter to sit than to stand
• treating those with whom we interact, as journalist Ellen Goodman has written, "as if they matter"
• treating even those with whom we disagree with respect and fairness.