The antidote to speaking of the faults of others is speaking with understanding and compassion. For those engaged in spiritual practice and for those who want to live harmoniously with others, this is essential. Pointing out peoples' good qualities to them and to others makes our own mind joyful; it promotes harmony in the envirionment and it gives people useful feedback. . . .
An interesting experiment is to try to say something nice to or about someone every day for a month. Try it. It makes us much more aware of what we say and why. It encourages us to change our perspective so that we notice others' good qualities. Doing so also improves our relationships tremendously.— Thubten Chodron in Taming the Mind