Peer-counseling skills are some of the most valuable tools we can have in life as we try to be present to the needs of friends and family. Teaching these skills to teens increases their empathy, diplomacy, problem-solving, and self-care, getting to the roots of how to make the world a kinder, more peaceful place.
So we think highly of Dr. James J. Crist's new book for readers age 11 and up. Crist is the clinical director and a staff psychologist at the Child and Family Counseling Center (CFCC) in Woodbridge, Virginia, and a certified substance-abuse counselor. He has spent his career listening to teens' concerns about problems in their lives and helping them come up with solutions.
He recognizes that while school peer-counseling programs have great value, kids don't have to be designated peer counselors in order to support their friends with active listening. I'm Here is designed both to convey useful counseling skills and to provide resources for readers, if they wish, to set up a peer-counseling program at their school.
Thoughtfully organized chapters cover the benefits of peer counseling, basic helping skills, problem solving, conflict resolution, and more. Each starts with a sample conversation that illustrates the chapter's topic. We were especially impressed by Chapter 3, which helps teens assess the qualities they have that could encourage a peer to feel safe opening up to them, and by Chapter 8, which delves into more intense topics that come up in counseling, like suicidal thoughts and plans, alcohol and drug use, and physical, sexual, or emotional abuse.
Appropriate cautions are given about what peer counseling is not: "You are never a replacement for a professional therapist or counselor. ... You are not expected to fix [people's] problems or figure out if they're suffering from anxiety or depression." Throughout the book, readers are reminded of how to find adults to consult when they feel over their heads in counseling situations.
References, an index, and further resources round out the book. Crist closes with this encouragement:
"Helping others is an act of kindness that can make your world a better place. By learning the skills described in this book and sharing them with others, you can have a positive impact on the lives of friends, family members, and peers, as well as on your larger school and community. And you'll learn skills to help yourself as well!"
