It is an enthralling adventure to fall in love and be swept away by the genuine feelings of joy, hope, and fresh possibilities. But couples soon discover that it takes large reserves of patience, understanding, openness, and forgiveness to deal with their differences. Fortunately, there are plenty of tools to help married people create and maintain rewarding relationships, including ways to negotiate disagreements, develop trust, and fight fairly.
Ethan (Mark Duplass) and Sophie (Elisabeth Moss) are seeing a therapist (Ted Danson) because their marriage seems to be in trouble. They recount the delight they had in each other on an early date when they secretly went for a late night dip in a neighbor's pool. But when Ethan tried to recreate the magic of that moment it backfired on them. "Our happiness used to be so easy; now I have to make it happen," he says sadly.
Seeing that this couple's anger, resentment, and disappointment are so great, their therapist decides to send them to a countryside retreat where they can reconnect and perhaps renew their relationship. He tells them that other couples have found the place to be very helpful as a therapeutic tool. When they arrive at this isolated place, they have high hopes of rekindling their love.
The One I Love is an incredibly interesting drama about the mysteries of the human personality and the roadblocks marriage partners face as they struggle to re-establish the intimacy that was at the core of their relationship. Screenplay writer Justin Lader has taken the romantic comedy genre and added a Twilight Zone-like twist involving the guest house on the country property.
We can't tell you more about the plot without spoilers. But suffice it to say, that this is a thought-provoking and engaging movie for couples who are stuck in a rut and want to examine various scenarios for why that's so. Thanks to the outstanding performances by Mark Duplass and Elizabeth Moss, all who experience this creative drama will benefit from its rich treasure-trove of insights into intimate relationships.
Go Deeper
Couples trying to keep a marriage alive are bound to face challenges and encounter roadblocks. Over the years, we have seen many movies about intimate relationships in trouble and couples splitting up. Here are some of the lessons we have learned about love, intimacy, facing difficulties, dealing with change, and much more from films about marriages under siege.
1. A romantic relationship can't be steered by control and ego. That only creates more stress, anger, and resentment in the one who feels oppressed and manipulated.
2. Give up the fantasies playing in your head in which your mate is someone more handsome, more sexy, or more brilliant than he or she is in real life. Instead put the accent on affirming the little things you love about your wife or husband.
3. Recognize and respect how you are different from each other and don't expect your mate to be someone just like you.
4. Be willing to take ownership of problems such as adultery, jealousy, and boredom. The way out is the way through these problems.
5. Don't waste precious time trying to fix the other person since this approach always accentuates the negative and leads to more judgment and unhappiness.
6. Acknowledge the ghosts in the room of your intimate relationship — the people and images that color your perception and understanding of marriage.
7. Make the most out of little acts of kindness, words of encouragement, and repeated verbal expressions of love.
8. Shift the role of marriage from emotional satisfaction to creating a shared life of working together to create a better world.
9. Strive to create new positive memories and reframe old ones from the past so you can ponder them afresh in your heart.
10. Realize that marriage takes on new shapes and forms as partners age and change. Be willing to go with the flow and even to reverse roles in your relationship.
