"Fear is a great solidifier, one of the primary blinders that keeps heartmind out of sight. Even if harsh emotions like anger cause more harm in the world, how often is fear a propelling factor? Fear leaves us feeling like a snail without a shell, afraid, defenseless. Isn't it when we feel unprotected that we do all sorts of harmful things?

"We shy away from fear; as Hot Lips Hoolihan used to say on M*A*S*H, 'I don't like fear. It scares me.' No wonder, considering how unappealing its masks are: dread, apprehensiveness, alarm, panic attacks, trepidation, worry, cold feet, anxiety, foreboding, and phobias. 'Stress,' a catchall phrase, is largely populated by fear's kin.

"Ironically, as inevitable as fear is, people rarely own up to being afraid. It's unusual to see undisguised fear except in small children, since at a certain age we start covering up our fear by whistling in the dark. We can spew out a barrage of obscurations as opaque as octopus ink, hoping to keep our fear invisible. Thus we may even lose contact with fear's presence, until it catches us off guard.

"What do we fear? Almost anything: being devalued, unlovable, out of control, insecure, lonely, or worthless. Some people fear abandonment; as odd as it may sound, I used to fear that people who had stopped loving me would stay rather than leave, thus providing constant reminders that I was unlovable!

"Our ways of covering fear are innumerable, starting with several 'f word' options: fight, flee, freeze, fantasize, and fake friendliness. These are reactions that color, or rather discolor, the fear that is already present, adding more pain to our considerable stash. We may try to distract ourselves from our fear by staying busy, trying to avoid the tension and worry that accumulate when we fear that the fear monster is gaining on us — covering our fear with fearful-looking demeanors may sound strange, but people often avoid even greater fears through addiction to self-doubt, confusion, indecisiveness, and weak or timid demeanors.

"Some of fear's camouflages have been considered acceptable parts of gender conditioning, such as the 'helpless woman in need of protection' style that was popular when I moved to South Carolina from Utah at age eleven. To my shock, my peers were already adept at using what were then called 'feminine wiles' to attract attention as our hormones started to rage. I took off my baseball cap. Even though I was already full to the brim with fear, I hoped to get into the social action — but I couldn't manage to bring off this façade. I chose a different way to hide my fear, striving to become the smartest and most talented seventh grader; maybe, I reasoned, I would be included if I were helpful enough by tutoring or entertaining enough by playing piano for assemblies. This may be hard to imagine, but being onstage in front of the entire student body playing the piano seemed less frightening than facing one of those girls on the playground.

"There are also angry-looking cover-ups for fear, like suiting up in the seemingly impenetrable armor of righteous indignation, contrariness, resentment, or belligerence. These may provide a false sense of safety, but they leave us just as uncomfortable as before, compounding the tension of fear with the tensions of anger.

"One cloak of fear, sometimes found in spiritual circles, is hiding fear's quiver under the cloak of imperturbability. This eventually starts to feel like the chitin exoskeleton of some insect, brittle and disconnected.

"One apparent difference between humans and other animals is that when animals are frightened or startled, they run, thus depleting their buildup of adrenalin. Compliant or withdrawn species tend to remain inactive when frightened. The buildup of cortisol courses through our veins, causing cellular mischief. If we double the impact by mulling over the frightening situation, the stress chemicals are eventually compounded into free-floating anxiety; we're scared, and nothing seems to be causing it. As we sing Muddy Waters's 'Worried Life Blues,' we project our worries onto whatever seems perilous — that other country, the stock market, politics. Worst of all, when physical danger is actually imminent, the reservoir of our built-up fear may flood, paralyzing us with panic, making us unable to respond. When we're immobilized, the results can be worse than the situation that evoked the fear.

"We may reach the point where we even fear happiness, regarding it as a sign that the axe might be about to fall. Yet it's miserable seeing life through a tunnel of fear. So we bring out our basic awareness tools, feeling the unpleasant physical sensations, recognizing the primary thoughts that goad our fear.

"A key point in working with fear is to keep asking a fundamental question: 'What is this?' The question is not 'What is this about,' which leads to historical rehashes. The answer to 'what is this' is always physical. For instance, let's say we're afraid a new acquaintance is going to write us off. Rather than withdrawing or turning on the charm, we take a few moments to feel our clenched neck and shaky hands, and stay engaged in whatever is going on.

"The components of fear span the physical, mental, and emotional dimensions of heartmind, so the exercises from those sections are useful in unmasking our fear. The open awareness dimension is particularly helpful, providing breathing room for our fear to come out into the open, rather than remaining constricted by the narrowed attention of unaddressed fear.

"Entering directly into fear may seem as scary as walking into our apartment late at night and having something brush against our arm. Terror! Turning on the light, we see that our winter scarf on the hook by the door is gently caressing our shoulder. The dim corners of consciousness can seem like this, until we have a closer look. Embracing our fear is part of being one with everything. Unexamined fear starts the cascade of other deadly four-letter-words: fear, to hate, to calling something we fear evil, to a justification to kill. Uninterrupted, the cycle mushrooms into hate crimes, religious warfare, and unimaginable atrocities. Fear is the most benign of these four-letter words, and all that it asks is what friends usually ask: that we give the fear some respectful attention and listen compassionately to its voice.

"It has been said that fear is the opposite of love. Actually, love, in its fullness, has no opposite, and can encompass even fear within its loving circle. By taking the necessary baby steps to experience our fear, we express our wish to live in the openness and wholeheartedness of love."