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Rami Shapiro
Rabbi Rami M. Shapiro is widely recognized as one of the most creative figures in contemporary American Judaism. A graduate of the Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion, he also holds a Ph.D. in Religious Studies from Union Graduate School. An award-winning poet, liturgist, and essayist, his prayers are included in worship services across the denominational spectrum of American congregations.
Shapiro was the founding rabbi of Temple Beth Or in Miami, Florida and senior rabbi of Metivta, a center for contemplative Judaism in Los Angeles, CA. He currently directs the One River Foundation, and is an adjunct professor of religious studies as Middle Tennessee State University. In addition he pursues his first love, writing, through books and a new column, Roadside Assistance for Your Spiritual Journey, in Spirituality & Health magazine.
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Lively and inspiring translations of ancient religious texts.
Cogent and thought-provoking commentary on wisdom traditions.
Practical suggestions on how to live a spiritual life every day.
Creative explorations of the interfaith territory that lies ahead.
A profile with bibliography and distinctive contributions to spirituality of Rami Shapiro, Jewish Rabbi, award-winning poet, liturgist, and essayist, best known for his creative translations and commentaries on Biblical and other ancient texts.
The Music Advantage
Music grows our brains and develops our capacities to live and love. This is one lesson among many in this interesting book by an educator and researcher into music education and brain development.
The cognitive research in music education is fascinating, and Dr. Collins — a trained classical musician, television presenter, and professor — communicates it very well. For instance, babies hear all sound as music, because they don’t yet understand the meanings of words. Song, singing, and playing music helps infants build trust as they sort out sound meanings in the process of developing talking skills and working with language.
Learning to keep a beat, through clapping or drumming, has been shown to aid children who are struggling with reading.
“The main thing to remember,” Collins writes in chapter 3, “is that your voice is a song inside your toddler’s ears. It is a song filled with information and your toddler is trying to separate out the elements, digest, and process them. Let them sing the same song for days and parrot language sounds until their brain recordings are made. And recognize that you are their rock star and their role model for language.”
In older children and adults, the research shows that music aids productivity. This throws the old parental complaint of “Turn that music off! You’re supposed to be studying!” into fresh perspective. However, the author clarifies: “We know that music and language processing have an overlapping neural network so it seems that listening to music with lyrics while writing words is a confusing activity for the brain.”
Here’s one that may surprise some readers: Playing an instrument teaches adolescents persistence and resilience as well, or better than, participation in sports does.
If you love music, are a parent or a teacher, or simply are interested in cognitive development, we think you will find this book helpful. It is written for the ordinary adult reader, but at the end of each chapter are “Further reading” suggestions that point to university studies and academic articles, for those wishing to delve deeper.
The latest research on the importance of music and sound in human development.
Communicating with Awareness
The way we speak with and listen to others can communicate love or hate, acceptance or rejection. The Buddha described wise speech, the speech that expresses reverence for life, as speaking only what is true and what is helpful. Yet caught as we are in reacting to each other out of wanting and fear, how do we recognize what is true? How do we discern what is helpful? How do we speak and listen from our hearts?
The following meditative practices are guidelines for being mindful and openhearted in communicating with each other. They have been drawn from different sources and are used in varying combinations by kalyanna mitta and similar groups around the United States. You can practice them yourself whenever you are engaged in conversation, or you can use them as formal guidelines for interpersonal meditation where two or more people are gathered for the purpose of mindful dialogue....
Training ourselves to be present with each other is a way to integrate mindfulness and lovingkindness into our daily life. In the moments when we communicate with honesty and kindness, we begin to dissolve the trance of separation. Instead of being driven by wanting or fear, we feel increasingly spontaneous and real. As much as any meditation, these practices allow us to discover, through relating wakefully with each other, the sweetness of our connectedness and belonging.
Set your intention. As a basic spiritual practice establish your intention to be present, honest and kind in relating to others in any circumstance. Remind yourself of your resolution at the start if each day, at the beginning of an interpersonal meditation or before any interaction with others.
Let your body be an anchor. Choose two or three touch points, places in your body where you can reawaken a sense of presence. These might be the sensations of breathing, the sensations in your shoulders, hands, stomach or feet. Return to them as often as possible when you are communicating with others. The more you practice staying aware of these touch points during your sitting practice and throughout the day, the more readily you’ll sustain an embodied presence when you are with others.
Listen from the heart. While others are speaking, try to let go of your own thoughts and pay attention to what they are saying. This means letting go of your agenda for the conversation. Stay aware of the feelings and sensations that occur throughout your body and especially in the heart area. Be particularly aware of your mind wandering off into judgments. If you find yourself criticizing, analyzing or interpreting, meet these thoughts with mindfulness, let them go and return to receptive listening. This doesn’t mean you are agreeing with whatever is being said, but rather you are honoring the other by offering your full presence and attention. Let your listening be wholehearted and deep, paying attention to the person’s tone, pitch, volume and words. In addition to content, allow yourself to receive the mood and spirit of what another is expressing.
Speak from the heart. Try not to prepare and rehearse what you will say in advance, especially while another is speaking. Rather, in the present moment speak what feels true and meaningful. This might be a response to what you have just heard. Or as happens in meditative dialogue, it may not be necessary to respond. Rather, what you say arises from your immediate stream of experience. Speaking from the heart begins with inward listening. Speak slowly enough to stay mindfully connected with your body and heart.
Pause, relax and attend. During your interactions pause repeatedly. Pause briefly before and after you speak. Pause as you are speaking to reconnect with your body and feelings. Pause when another is done speaking, giving some space for what they have said to settle. With each pause relax your body and mind. Rest in openness, paying full attention to this moment’s experience. After pausing you might deepen your attention by using inquiry to check in with your heart and mind. Ask yourself, “What is true now? What am I feeling?” Deepen your awareness of the other by asking yourself, “What might this person be experiencing?” This inquiry is both active and receptive – you are intentionally asking and investigating, and also opening to whatever is arising. Use pause-relax-attend whenever you remember as a sacred pathway into presence.
Practice Radical Acceptance. The effort to be present and awake with each other is very humbling. The given is that we will forget our intention, forget to connect with our body, forget to listen without thinking, forget not to rehearse, forget, forget, forget. Hold the whole process with Radical Acceptance, forgiving yourself and others again and again for being perfectly imperfect. When Radical Acceptance is a container for our relationships, genuine intimacy becomes possible.
Guidelines for wise speech, starting with setting your intention.
Love Your Enemies
This book came into being after Buddhist writers and spiritual teachers Sharon Salzberg and Robert Thurman teamed up to present a weekend workshop on coming to terms with one's enemies. They share personal stories, meditation sessions, and a variety of spiritual practices designed to spur love for those who are seen as adversaries or opponents.
According to Buddhist philosophy there are four kinds of enemies in everyday life. They are : the outer enemy such as people, institutions, and situations that mean to harm us; the inner enemy of anger, hatred, fear, and other destructive emotions; and the secret enemy that isolates us from others; and the super-secret enemy of self-disgust and self-loathing.
The chief contributor to division in the world is the philosophy of dualism, which promotes the idea that there is an Us and a Them. This has infected people's minds and opened the door to more violence. Salzberg describes three kinds of patience we can cultivate to counter the inner enemy of anger: tolerant patience, insightful patience, and forgiving patience.
Thurman writes cogently about the tyranny of separation and salutes the ideal of restorative justice where both the victim and the perpetrator tear down the walls that cut them off from each other. Another positive practice is doing the yoga of self-creation "to provide you with a playful, magical way to experience creative self-confidence."
Buddhists have made an invaluable contribution to spirituality in our time with their emphasis upon waking up to the joys and wonders that can abound after we make friends with our enemies.
Personal stories and spiritual practices on loving our enemies.
Attitude Reconstruction
Jude Bijou is a licensed marriage and family therapist, professional educator, and longtime student of Eastern philosophy. Her work with people seeking to lead happier and more fulfilling lives lies behind this enlightening work on transforming our emotions, thinking positively, and using the five tools that create lasting change.
According to Bijou, emotions are spontaneous physical reactions to what happens to us during the day. They color our moods and actions and shine through our bodies. She defines the six core attitudes as sadness, joy, anger, love, fear, and peace.
The five tools that provide us with the means of building a better life are: emotions, thoughts, intuition, speech, and action. It is possible to reframe our thinking and behavior by demolishing bad habits and replacing them with new behavior.
Throughout this accessible and soul-stirring psychological work, Bijou presents charts of actions and practices which can move us from sadness to joy, from anger to love, and from fear to peace. Her theory of "Attitude Reconstruction" is good medicine for anyone on the path of spiritual transformation.
An enlightening work on spiritual transformation.
In You There Is a Future
God of the peasants and the homeless,
God of the desperately poor and the cynically rich,
God of the needy and the greedy,
God of numbing bureaucracies,
God above the warring nations,
Bless and humble us with your presence.
We are waiting. We are awaited.
We confess to you our sins
of action and inaction, of silence and speech.
Through our misuse of power in personal,
communal, national, and international life.
Through searching for security in all
the wrong ways and our use of technologies
that endanger the earth and all living things.
Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy.
Our world grows daily more dangerous
and distressing, especially to the least
among us. We thank you that you do not leave
us comfortless, that your Spirit speaks
to our spirits, and that in you
there is a future with hope.
An invocation of faith, gratitude and hope in God's presence and mercy in our lives.
A Little Rule for Beginners
This handy little paperback, which is small and slender enough to fit in a purse or a pocket, contains Joan Chittister's seasoned commentary on the values, visions, revelations, and insights of Benedict of Nusia. The Rule of Benedict from the sixth century has been followed for 1500 years, Chittister explains, because it shows us how to live an ordinary life extraordinarily well. It offers "a timeless spirituality that is applicable to the issues of any age, including and perhaps, most especially our own with its urgent need for inclusive community, empowering leadership, stewardship of creation, good work and holy leisure, nonviolence, and a sense of meaning and purpose."
Benedict's wise counsel is found in passages dealing with the twelve steps of humility as an invitation to freedom; the courage to constantly start over in life; the ability to treat everyone in the ways which bring out the best in them; the habit of treating nature, animals and objects with reverence; encouragement to cherish every moment in community as a spiritual teacher with many lessons to share with us; and much more.
A Little Rule for Beginners shines a wonderful and edifying light on the essence of Benedictine spirituality, and the nimble artwork by Marcy Hall is enchanting.
A pocket-sized summary of the Rule of Benedict.
Saving Civility
Sara Hacala, a certified etiquette and protocol consultant, has written a cogent and practical resource guide outlining the ideas, attitudes, and practices necessary to restore civility in American society where it is increasingly under fire from many directions.
Among the signs of a trend toward incivility are texting and cell phone abuse, getting bothered by having to wait, and anger against those who cut in line. General rudeness is demonstrated by self-absorption, selfishness, an inability to listen, a failure to be truly present, and a lack of respect for people.
Another sign of the times that hinders the practice of civility is the frantic pace of life and the way we communicate through keystrokes and social media sites. As a result, face-to-face interaction, even voice-to-voice, are superseded by texting and e-mail. Finally, there is the disturbing use of anonymity on the Internet as an aggressive and potent weapon which can be used to trash bloggers and reviewers, spread malicious gossip, and terrorize others through cyberbullying.
Saving Civility is a call to action rather than an assessment of bad manners and even worse behavior. Hacala believes that true change can only come when we all do our part "to shape a more civilized society and a politer planet." She counsels us to ponder our own behavior at home, at work, and in public. Do we put others or ourselves first? Do we have a deep respect for all people or do we see some as enemies or contenders or below us? Are we able to empathize or are we oblivious to others? Do we really listen when someone else is speaking or do we constantly interrupt in order to score points? Are we nice or nasty? Can we control our temper or do we have no interest in anger management?
In order to give you a sense of the 52 ways to save civility, here are some of the chapter titles:
• Smile
• Sharpen Your Social Antenna
• Hold Your Tongue
• Disagree Agreeably
• Celebrate Diversity
• Practice Nonviolence
• Embrace Kindness
• Consider Your Fellow Travelers
According to Hacala, civility is often animated by ethics and morality. Underneath polite behavior is a reverence for life that honors the goodness and divinity within others. Certain important character values grow out of civility such as trust, telling the truth, taking the high road of integrity, cultivating optimism, being generous, embodying patience, being grateful (beginning with the basics such as saying please, thank you, and excuse me), minding your cybermanners, and learning to forgive.
Mohandas Gandhi once said: "I suppose leadership at one time meant muscles: but today, it means getting along with people." The simple act of being friendly is one of the major building blocks of a more civil society. It means relating in positive ways to people we meet and collaborating instead of competing with them. "Given that most of us want to be liked, becoming likeable is something we can all put our minds to."
Saving Civility by Sara Hacula is a pathbreaking work that offers sage advice on ways we can become emissaries for courtesy, reverence, respect, and empathy in these contentious and adversarial times.
A pathbreaking book with 52 practices and ideas for enabling us to become emissaries of civility in these contentious times.
Jewish Dharma
Brenda Shoshanna is a practicing psychologist with more than 25 years of experience. She is the author of several books including Zen and the Art of Falling in Love. Raised in an orthodox Jewish family, she is now a long-term student and practitioner of both Judaism and Zen Buddhism. As an interfaith counselor, she has written an extraordinary book that vividly demonstrates the rich cross-fertilization that can take place when your spiritual practice stems from two traditions. Of an estimated three million practicing Buddhists in the United States today, nearly one third also identify themselves as Jewish. Shoshanna addresses them and all others who are open to the adventure of interspirituality.
The material covered in this book conveys the wisdom and ethical sweep of both Judaism and Zen. The chapter titles preview her broad perspective:
• Jewish Prayer and the Practice of Zazen
• Seeking Understanding: Torah Study and Koan Practice
• Disciplining Yourself: Mitzvot and Mindfulness
• Calming the Restless Mind: Sabbath and Nondoing
• Giving Up Defensiveness: Charity and Open Hands
• Guarding Your Words: Lashon Hara and the Zen Practice of Silence
• Finding True Support: Dissolving False Attachments and Letting Go
• Discovering Yourself: Jewish Identity and Selflessness
and more.
• Building Relationships: Marriage and Courtship; Monks and Nuns
• Making Peace in the Family and the World: Forgiveness and Renunciation
• Healing Sorrow: Tikkun Olam and Total Acceptance
• Understanding Life Purpose: Caring for One Another and Bodhisattva Activity
Shoshanna uses many colorful anecdotes from Judaism and Zen but the major emphasis is on the practices which animate these two sturdy traditions. She points out that in the Zen tradition if you want to see the beauty of a room, you take everything out so that you can get a glimpse of its original nature: "In Zen practice you do the same. You take everything out of your life that causes clutter, static, confusion, and greed. . . . As you do this, you naturally find your own inner balance and strength."
Both Zen and Judaism require persistence — the ability to absorb disappointment and disillusionment. Each calls us to live in the present moment, to eschew distractions, to abandon pride, and to practice love and kindness. Both traditions present a new way of life: Zen as the middle way and Torah as a life of balance.
The discipline and structure of spiritual practice in both Judaism and Zen offer an alternative to the compulsive behavior and addiction that is so rampant in our culture. Observing the Sabbath in Judaism and the practice of nondoing in Zen are antidotes to restlessness, greed, and consumerism.
In closing, we present just two examples of the kind of practices that make this such a rich and practical book, one that you will turn to again and again. From Judaism, here is a practice of charity. And from Zen, a practice of hospitality.
"Open your hand and give many times. It is a mitzvah to give charity (tzedukah) to the poor. You are more obligated to do this mitzvah than any other. It says that whoever sees a poor person and turns his eyes away, transgresses. You should not think that by giving charity you are losing money; just the opposite, you will be blessed. There are many forms of charity — money, time, attention, work, giving someone else the benefit of the doubt. Give with an open hand and heart, and your life will be fruitful. The highest way of giving is simply to give, wanting nothing in return."
"From the Zen point of view, the deepest kindness and generosity is to welcome others exactly as they are. This deep form of welcoming strangers welcomes them in truth and simplicity; it welcomes the authentic person, not the persona or mask that we wear. In many Zen centers, individuals wear plain robes. The purpose of this is so that no one can feel more important if he has fancy clothes or fine jewelry. With robes on it is more difficult to compare oneself to others, or to focus on external presentation. And one, in turn, cannot rely on costumes or props. Who one truly is, speaks for oneself."
An extraordinary book on the relevance of the teachings and spiritual practices of Judaism and Zen to every dimension of our lives.
Mass
In their important book The Violence Project: How to Stop a Mass Shooting Epidemic, Jillian Peterson, a psychologist, and James Densley, a sociologist, describe the work of a nonpartisan research center aimed at investigating mass gun violence. They created a comprehensive database about the life histories of more than 170 mass shooters, and also interviewed the victims' families, first responders, and experts to create a better understanding of why such events happen and what might be done to put an end to these tragedies.
The statistics are shocking. More than 1,200 lives have been lost, and Americans from high school age down, have never known a world without a mass shooting. More than half of American teenagers worry about a shooting at their school, and a lifetime of active shooter drills, locker searches, and locked downs at school has seeded in them an overwhelming fear of imminent death.
Peterson and Densley point out that millions of dollars have been spent in the hunt for what many call "these monsters." But this study reveals that there is no one profile of a mass shooter, only multiple pathways to approach mass shootings, each filled with missed opportunities for prevention and intervention.
Mass is a harrowing drama written and directed by Fran Kranz which points out the trail of pain, horror, grief, anger, and guilt left behind by one troubled teenager who murdered 10 classmates and then committed suicide. The film focuses on two sets of parents -- Richard (Reed Birney) and Linda (Ann Dowd), whose son was the shooter, and Jay (Jason Isaacs) and Gail (Martha Plimpton), who son was killed at school. A social worker (Michelle Carter) has arranged for them to meet in a small basement room of an Episcopalian Church years after the massacre. They see this as an opportunity for some healing and perhaps closure.
The meeting gets off awkwardly. Linda has brought flowers, and they can't decide where to put them. They have brought pictures of their sons, but find it hard to settle on one story to share with the other couple. Gail finally says the obvious: "I want to know about your son because he killed mine." Did they intuit something was wrong? Was it pathological? Do they regret what happened? Do they blame themselves?
Richard and Linda explain that there was not one thing to point to in their son's behavior and reactions. Maybe bullying, computer games, not fitting in, bad therapy, secrecy, an inability to empathize. As for their own responses after the event, they didn't know what to say. They mourned too. They want to remember their son for what he was not for what he did.
This is a hard conversation, made vivid and real by outstanding acting by the cast and a script that touches on many levels of grief and the difficulty of talking about forgiveness, let along practicing it. We encourage you to stick with it and let it become your opportunity to listen to the effects of mass shootings and develop your own capacity for empathy with all those involved.
Mass premiered at the Sundance Film Festival in 2021 and in December won the Independent Spirit Robert Altman Award which paid tribute to director Fran Kranz and the ensemble cast. In an interview with Sky News, Kranz noted that he wrote the intense drama in order to explore the themes of forgiveness and reconciliation, feelings that to those faced with the darkest of situations might seem impossible to come by. He explained that the film was inspired by true stories about parents of shooters meeting parents of victims and by South Africa's Truth and Reconciliation Commission, a restorative justice body set up in 1996 to investigate human rights abuses after the end of apartheid. Like those examples, this fictional story shows how open-hearted conversation can lead to healing, even after a terrible tragedy.
GOING DEEPER
In her book The Rising, Wendy Wright points out the importance of the ethical theme of Mass:
"Forgiveness seems to remain a theme waiting to be explored in depth in our present age. This deep and extensive kind of loving of enemies . . . seems to have become a theme of special urgency in the contemporary world."
Mass offers us an opportunity to ponder forgiveness as a spiritual practice. Here are four quotations to start your reflections and inspire applications in your own life.
"Forgiveness is the final form of love."
-- Reinhold Niebuhr in Heart of Forgiveness
"The practice of forgiveness is our most important contribution to the healing of the world."
-- Marianne Williamson in A Return to Love
"In the end, forgiveness simply means never putting another person out of our heart."
-- Jack Kornfield in The Art of Forgiveness, Lovingkindness, and Peace
"On the wings of forgiveness is carried all other wisdom."
-- Honey J. Rubin in Compassion
More quotes on forgiveness.
A fictional story that proves how open-hearted conversation can lead to healing, even after a terrible tragedy.