Becoming Aware
"Until this time he had remained always in nearly the same interior state of very steady joy, without having any knowledge of interior things of the spirit. The days while that vision lasted or somewhat before it began (for it lasted many days), a forceful thought came to trouble him by pointing out the hardships of his life, like a voice within his soul. 'How will you be able to endure this life for the seventy years you have to live?' Sensing that it was from the enemy, he answered interiorly with great vehemence, 'Wretch! Can you promise me an hour of life?' So he overcame the temptation and remained at peace.
"But soon after the temptation noted above, he began to have great changes in his soul. Sometimes he felt so out of sorts that he found no relish in saying prayers nor in hearing Mass nor in any other devotion he might practice. At other times quite the opposite of this came over him so suddenly that he seemed to have thrown off sadness and desolation just as one snatches a cape from another's shoulders. Now he started getting perturbed by the changes that he had never experienced before, and he said to himself, 'What new life is this that we are now beginning?' "
