1. Where in your life do you struggle with forgiving? Do you believe it is possible to truly forget?

2. Where in your life do you need to forgive yourself more?

3. Were you able to see gossip as spreading like pillow feathers in the wind? Share an experience where you have been the victim of hurtful gossip.

4. Linda Weltner describes children playing and notes that they can get over a fight quickly because they choose "happiness over righteousness." Talk about a situation in your life when you have done the same. What questions might you ask yourself in a conflict situation to trigger this response.

5. What struck you about praying for someone or something that pushes your buttons?

6. What act of rebellion did you do as a teenager or young adult? Do you see it differently today in hindsight?

7. Share an experience where you jumped to a conclusion like the man did when the empty boat bumped into his. What did hearing about this experience teach you?

8. Share your responses to Jack Kornfield’s piece about the Cambodian monks acceptance that “hatred never ceases by hatred but by love alone.”

Possible Practices

1. Consider something you have been unwilling to forgive. Did any of the segments in the DVD open you to reexamining the situation?

2. Make an effort this week to forgive yourself about something.

3. Try an experiment and see if you can find something beautiful about someone you have distaste for.

4. Journal about your most vivid experiences of forgiveness. Can it inform you today about something you have been unable to forgive?

5. What is a ritual you can create to release trapped feelings of wrongdoing by others?

Visit the Forgiveness homepage for more ways to practice this spiritual quality. Follow the links in the left column to:

  • a collection of quotations on compassion
  • book recommendations
  • book excerpts and teaching stories
  • film recommendations
  • music and art meditations
  • a daily cue, reminder, vow, and blessing for compassion
  • a prayer or mantra
  • personal explorations including imagery and journal exercises
  • practices and spiritual exercises
  • questions for discussion, storytelling, sharing
  • take action with household, group, and community projects
  • and more

Prepared by Persephone Zill with contributions from Frederic and Mary Ann Brussat