You must forgive the dead for dying. They could not help it. You must forgive the dead for all the wrong they have done to you, so that they can leave in peace.
You must also ask the dead to forgive you for all the wrong you have done to them, so that you can understand and accept the life you had together.
You must also forgive yourself for all the rage, all the hurt, and bitterness of your grieving, in order to be released with it.
One of the lasting legacies of uncompleted grieving is bitterness. But you must move on from the sense of outrage, injustice, and sheer pain that this death has brought you.
Death is painful, outrageous, and unfair; but once one moves beyond that, one can come to terms with it as something which has merely happened and, in happening, changed your life forever.
— Jerusha Hull McCormack, Grieving: A Beginner's Guide