Visiting the graves of deceased friends and family members used to be a regular practice for many people. Today we tend to forget or ignore those who have passed on, possibly because we have fearful attitudes about death and a weak belief in the goodness of the next world. But visiting and tending a grave need not be a morbid activity. In fact, it can be a celebration and a time of renewal for yourself and the memory of the person buried there.
Take food, drink, and flowers. Bring a poem or passage to read that the deceased was fond of. Make the occasion a kind of picnic. Toast the deceased, leave some food and the flowers, be joyful. The dead are among the ancestors, the saints, and the angels. We hope to be reunited with them after our deaths, but we do not need to wait until then to begin to celebrate them.— Tom Cowan in The Way of the Saints