Make a list of your major life disappointments. Pick the most devastating one. Spend ten minutes writing down how you reacted to it at the time, without any judgment about your reaction: If you were disappointed in yourself, did you guilt-trip, blame, shame, or hold it against yourself as a failure? Or did you respond with compassion, forgiving yourself? If it was in relation to another, did you shut down and stop trusting? Did you leave or resolve it? Did you withdraw into anger and cold resentment for years? Did you close your heart to that person and find it impossible to forgive him or her? However you reacted, hold your reaction in loving compassion. Create a ritual to let the disappointment go. You might write the whole incident on a piece of paper and burn the piece of paper as you vow to let it go. Or find a large stone that represents disappointment, and throw it in a lake, a river, or ocean, letting the water carry it away.

Carolyn Hobbs in Joy, No Matter What