Good discussions and brainstorming sessions benefit from participant's learning how to keep things in perspective. In Jewish Spiritual Parenting: Wisdom, Activities, Rituals and Prayers for Raising Children with Spiritual Balance and Emotional Wholeness, Michelle November describes a practice she learned from her children's high school teacher: "It is useful to ask our children to first determine whether their problem is a 'big thing or a small thing … The teenagers there learn, for example, that a car accident is a big thing. Not passing a driver's test on the first try is really a small thing. Younger children can grow to comprehend that, while hearing that your best friend is moving out of town is a big thing, not being invited to an acquaintance's birthday party, though it hurts, is really a small thing." The next time a child reports on something that is upsetting him or her, ask, "Is this a big thing or a small thing?"

— Kristin Ritzau, Michelle November in Practicing Democracy with Children by Kristin Ritzau, Mary Ann Brussat