Show Kids the Many Ways They Can Give Time and Energy
"There are an infinite number of ways that we give others our time and energy, and we need to model and teach them all to our children. Here are some ideas to get you started.
"1. Help kids find ways to volunteer their time. My kids and I volunteer at the local food bank over the summer and during holidays.
"2. Create giving traditions. Many families pick out presents for underprivileged children over the holidays, help clean up parks on Earth Day, or make financial donations to charitable organizations on the anniversary of a loved one's death. Could you start doing volunteer work during family reunions, together as a family? Take a service-oriented vacation during spring break each year?
"3. Praise kids for showing empathy and emotional support to others. Teach kids that sometimes the best gift they can give is their quiet support and good listening.
"4. Encourage kids to perform small acts of kindness. My kids' preschool taught them to always pick up trash when they see it on the ground. Though this frequently grosses me out, it is a small act of altruism that makes my kids feel great. These small acts of kindness don't need to be much. Multiple sclerosis (MS) patients who were trained to provide compassionate, unconditional positive regard for other MS sufferers through monthly fifteen-minute telephone calls 'showed pronounced improvement in self-confidence, self-esteem, depression and role functioning' over two years. These helpers were especially protected against depression and anxiety.
"5. Provide kids with teaching, mentoring, or caregiving opportunities. When children are struggling with something, such as learning to read, they benefit the most by helping others who are also struggling. We can take a cue from our primate cousins: monkeys who have extremely poor social skills due to neglect and isolation recover only when given the opportunity to care for a baby monkey.
"6. Show kids how celebrating other people and significant events are acts of giving that amplify positive emotions. Encourage the nonmaterial aspects of celebration. Start traditions that celebrate people on their birthdays — not toys and cake and balloons — such as telling the story of a child's birth, or having everyone at a party complete the sentence ''I'm happy you were born because . . .' "
