"Patience is not high on the list of qualities you'd expect to find in a cabdriver. For me, it's a hard one to master anyway, and the truth is, driving a cab doesn't help. I'm thinking about the fares I'm missing while I'm standing in line, and it drives me nuts. Of course, there's a simple solution. If I never got out of the cab, I'd never miss a fare. I can almost see myself trying that. But then I'd never develop the paramita of patience.
"It takes some perspective to get through the day. I have to accept that there are trade-offs in life. If I'm going to get a coffee to go at Whole Foods, it's going to take a little time. I could try the Stop 'n' Rob, but they make a dozen pots at six in the morning, then leave them out all day. Before long, they're undrinkable. But there's no line at the coffee counter.
"Out on the road, it just gets harder. I'm riding down the interstate when traffic bogs down and I'm sitting helplessly in a sea of cars. Then the dispatcher starts handing out calls, and I can't take one because I have no idea when I'll be able to pick it up. When the traffic clears, the dispatcher is taking a smoke break, so I won't be getting a fare for a while. This is why so many cabdrivers throw their keys in a storm drain and walk away.
"Looking around in traffic, I can see the other drivers stewing in their own cars, glaring at each other as they sit there texting, reading the paper, waiting to move. They're all late for something, and they don't like it. It's hard on everybody.
"Life is full of trade-offs. Spend time in line to get a decent cup of coffee or do without. Get on the interstate and hope the traffic keeps moving or take the streets and drive slower. You take your chances. There's nothing we can do to change it. All we can do is get used to it.
"The paramitas really refer to the development of personal qualities as a step toward spiritual growth, not as a way to make city life bearable. Of course, there's no real difference between everyday life and Zen practice. So being patient behind the wheel and in other day-to-day situations is as much a part of practice as reading the sutras or sitting zazen. I'm not going to race through to buddhahood in one sudden burst of acceleration, as much as I'd like that. It's going to take time, and I'll have to accept that and keep trying. Because I don't plan to give up.
"I might as well slow down and enjoy the journey.
"The frustrations of everyday life are hard to avoid without checking into a monastery or a psych ward, and most of us aren't going to sign up for either. But we can try to avoid the emotional attachments that cause so many problems for us. In order to practice Zen, we have to let go of some of the drama in our lives. Practice gives us a chance to see beyond our attachments and take things as they are. I remember reading a book on Zen practice that referred to day-to-day events as the scenery of our lives. It's interactive, but it's still scenery. We should try to find a way to appreciate the scenery without letting it drive us nuts. Finding it just takes practice. And, ironically, patience."
